[A loud, long, lingering scream, echoing into the void] goes here

Parcelforce.

Parcelforceparcelforceparcelforce.

*sob*

Edit: Mirabile dictu! Parcelforce has delivered to me, quite unexpectedly, the very same box that they still claim is sitting in their Coventry hub with "address problems" (since 30 April), and that they assured me they couldn't possibly do anything about without a query being raised by the US sender. Of course, they had previously lied to the USPS and told them the package was delivered on 1 May, so the sender was unable to raise a query. Oh what a tangled web they weave. Seriously, the delivery of this box in no way absolves them of their previous screw-ups - in fact it adds an interesting new layer of deceit and incompetence - but hey: I have my box. I don't have to take it all quite so personally any more.

In other news, apparently Parcelforce is "not a licensed postal operator" and hence doesn't fall under Postwatch's remit. How does that work? Parcelforce is the national carrier, inasmuch as they work hand-in-glove with Royal Mail and the Post Office, their websites and call centres are closely interlinked, and, well, when you post a package overseas using your country's national carrier, it gets handed over to Parcelforce on arrival in the UK. How can it not be a licensed operator? It seems we have the worst of both worlds: the inefficiency of a monopoly, with the lack of accountability of a private company.