Do not adjust your set - no, do, really

Sometimes it's the small details that make all the difference.

Reading, on a Sky News strapline, that "two men are relieved to be dead after their helicopter crashed off the Mull of Kintyre", raises all kinds of metaphysical questions. Has Sky been teaching its journalists how to contact the recently deceased, for truly hardhitting comment? Is it planning to share this valuable knowledge, or is it a trade secret? Why were they relieved - are they such passionate opponents of the truck driver's gear change that they wanted nothing to do with Macca's favourite Scottish peninsula? Did they just not want to be stuck in cold Scottish water? Is it really fun on the other side? What?

Pretty disappointing, then, to realise that I should have read that "two men are BELIEVED to be dead". The curse of all-caps, and an inadequately adjusted TV monitor.